I hate that I fell in love with someone I'll never meet. I miss someone I'll never know. And I ache to hold someone I never can. There's just no good reason for that. And now I'm a little less innocent. I'm a little more jaded. And I'm a lot more scared that if it ever happens again I won't be able to enjoy it for all the worry I'll have. There is something amazing about having a baby that I won't be able to enjoy in the same way because I know first hand what can go wrong. And that makes me sad. I want my innocence back.
n 1: the quality of innocent naivete [syn: artlessness, ingenuousness, naturalness] 2: the state of being free from sin or moral wrong; lacking a knowledge of evil [syn: purity, sinlessness] 3: a state or condition of being innocent of a specific crime or offense; "the trial established his innocence" [ant: guilt]WordNet ® 2.0, © 2003 Princeton University
I don't know what the future holds. But I know that I want it to hold a baby, one that I get to carry and keep, for me. That is my greatest desire. My biggest wish. My hope.